10 Things I Learned On My First Night

So, I had my first night of work last night, going from 5:00 PM to 2:30 AM. Normally, my work schedule's going to go from 6:30 to 2:30, but since this was opening day, I had an extra hour and a half.

But within those nine and a half hours I learned quite a bit. Here are the Top 10 things an inexperienced dishwasher should learn right away:

10.) Washing dishes is not easy. There's a lot of work to it.

9.) Take something that will guarantee you stay awake through your whole shift, because you will be moving around a lot.

8.) Take your breaks when you can, and regulate food into your stomach whenever you can, becasue getting a chance to stop and eat is near impossible. Don't be afraid to ask the cooks to make you a hotdog or something; in this enviornment, it's all for one and one for all.

7.) The sink hose will hate you. No matter how softly you press on it, or how gently you talk to it, it will always send what you're trying to wash off flying over you and your work place.

6.) With that said, always try to keep your workplace clean. A clean workplace will make YOU personally feel a lot better and will make the job go by a little easier.

5.) Dishes are like bunnies. They are always multiplying.

4.) If you are an atheist, you will have even more of a reason to be, because no amount of praying will make the dishes stop coming.

3.) The grill pans are the worst things in the world to clean off. In that regard, make best friends with the steel sponges, because those things are lifesavers.

2.) The lesson, "if you touch something and it burns you, you know never to touch it again" has no application here. You will constantly be handling scalding-hot places, glasses, bowls, and silverware. And you will get burned. A lot. And, sadly, you will get used to it.

And the number one lesson you should learn right off the bat:

1.) You are the dish guy. You are about as low on the chain as you can possibly get. You will get pissed on, crapped on, sprayed, burned, kicked around, ordered around, and be expected to clean the Mount Everest of dishes by yourself with little to no sass. Your job is not necessarily to like it. Your job is to deal with it, and do the best you can.

With all that said, I really like this job so far, I work with some great people, and it looks like business will be terrific. Now that I know more or less what to expect, I can better prepare for it and start getting a real routine going.

So there we go. My tales of the bar will be laid out here. I'll update when I can, either weekly or daily, and try and keep this as safe for viewers of all ages as I possibly can. Let's see how this goes.

On to Round Two.